ATTENTION! IMPORTANT NOTICE!!!
There has been an attack of menopause in this house. It tends to contaminate everything, including relationships, kindness, tolerance, memory, and sense of humor. For now, this house is temporarily quarantined so that most of the contamination is restricted to the kitchen and the bedroom. The “chill pill” is available to all occupants, and must be administered immediately upon being infected by the effects of menopause, otherwise, not only the sufferer but the recipients may also experience intolerance and loss of sense of humor.
For instant relief of symptoms step outside, breathe fresh air, and know that this too shall pass.